Student seriously injured in failed suicide attempt

The The China Post reported today in its Friday, March 28, 2008 issue about a 12th grader, an 18-year-old teenage boy, surname Lee, was seriously injured yesterday after he suddenly jumped over the fence outside his classroom located on the fifth floor at the affiliated Senior High School of National Taiwan Normal University, following a brief argument with his mother.

Earlier that morning, Lee's mother visited him to inquire about the proceedings for his application to medical school; the boy and his mother then engaged in a verbal argument outside the classroom, while students were still in class.

Fortunately, the boy did not life-threatening injuries but was so seriously hurt that he has to stay in intensive care for another 48 hours at the Ren Ai Municipal Hospital.

Nonetheless, parents should ask themselves, if they have a trusting relationship with their children. Over the years I have noted a drastic change in the behaviors of parents. Eight years ago many parents were still strict ( often too strict) and their children knew what their rules were and what role they had to play. Today however many parents are committed to a more lenient and even free way of raising their children and teenagers. Consequently, many children and teenagers feel lost in their world.

It would be therefore a good idea to reevaluate the standards and rules in each family. Children need rules to feel save and secured. That does not mean they have to be torture. Instead, rules should be laid out and explained by their parents very early in life. If children understand the need for rule they are more likely to follow them. Moreover, parents have to be consistent. It is not a good habit to change the rules or punish their children impulsively. Yes, reasonable punishment is needed, so children learn that braking the rules has consequences.

However, most important is a trusting relationship between parents and their children. An open minded discussion is often needed. Parents should listen to the concerns and agreements of their children. Explain to your children why you think they should do what you tell them. Simply saying, "I am your father or mother and you do what I tell you," does not solve the problem. The opposite is true. Yes, Children will obey but not because they want to or understand the need to do it but because you as parents have the power. That again, this leaves the door open for actions such as suicide attempt. It is often the only way, especially teenagers, to show that they have some control over their own life.

Consequently, I believe giving your children the feeling that they are in charge of their own life would help to avoid such conflict. At the some time guiding them to learn to make the right decisions for their life, will foster the trust between parents and their children.